if something actually steals nutrients from your body it probably tastes amazing. if it's been chemically engineered to make my brain think it's drugs i want to eat it. a few weeks ago i was exposed to a red velvet cake that was made from a mix with canned frosting erotically slathered all over it. my friend was really self-conscious that i would be offended by such gross cake-related negligence, but really all i could think of was the sweet sweet chemicals.
in america the chemicals are cheap and plentiful. they're also more fun than actual food. during a recent trip to the baking aisle in my trench coat and sunglasses i marvelled in the cake mixes and canned frostings. did you know there are six neon colours of funfetti now??? neon is the most delicious chemical of all.
although i managed to resist the cake mixes AND the funfetti i couldn't stop myself from finally indulging in my secret fantasy of duncan hines frosting creations. it's basically a can of frosting "base" that you add a packet of whatever flavour you want to said base. the mixes are all fun flavours like orange creme, white chocolate raspberry, mint chocolate, etc. i chose bubble gum because obviously. it also costs like eight cents for both the base and the mix, so you know it's quality.
|so wrong yet so right.|
i'm either going to save it for a future cupcake project, or for when i finally break down and a box of pink velvet cake mix and use them together in secret shame. more than likely i'm just gonna eat it with a spoon in the middle of the night watching literally hundreds of episodes of top model.
|you better believe it.|
love and partially hydrogenated food stuffs,
p.s. i also secretly used the cinnamon roll flavour as the frosting on my pear gruyère cupcakes...oops.